{    Cnytr   }

{Tuesday, May 18, 2004  }

From the Journal News and from Students for Life at NYU comes this photo of my long-lost friend Jenni Logan, the her caption:

"Isn't it too funny that out of 401 NYU Students (400 of whom were supposedly "Voices for Choice") the one Student for Life gets to be in the paper?"

Thanks for commenting in my blog, Jenni!

And I'll ... think about that. If someone is really looking for p0rn ... er... porn, there would definitely a million other sites that came up on a search before my blog. And if I were writing for people like that, I would take a different approach, a little less of "EW EW EW EW that's disGUSting" and more like "Hi. What you're doing is wrong for these reasons, but that's okay beCAUSE we can help you." (See, the "but that's okay" gets the person's attention and they're like "what, that's okay?" and I can say "no, it's not really, it's not at all in fact, but there is help for that.)

In fact, if you or someone you know is in to pornography and are willing to change, this software called "Covenant Eyes" works as a deterrant to them. It acknowledges free will -- the person is free to look at such images on the internet or on KazAa or something -- but a report of their websurfing will be sent to an accountability partner. It's not free, but it's not expensive, and any amount of money is worth helping someone rid themselves of pornography, I think.

Here are some links from dads.org, including some very good articles by Steve Wood of What is pornography doing to fathers and their families?

Also an EXTREMELY GOOD ARTICLE purely about the psychological aspect of pornography and the conditioning of such is Treatment and Healing of Sexual and Pornographic Addictions; this also contains some steps to ridding yourself of it. An important thing to remember if you have a friend, spouse, sibling, boyfriend/girlfriend (girls, while is it even more discordant to their nature, are not impervious to it, either), YOU cannot cure them, no matter how much you love them or they love you or how much you try, they have to want to cure themselves, and then they have to do it.

Also, if someone has told you of a pornography problem they have, they will assume that you know they have a problem with self-stimulation (the "m" word which I cannot say). This is, in fact, the way a pornography problem becomes a problem, and it is conditioned into them by this. I will say that I have yet to learn how these problems (both of them) start.

A word to wives whose husbands have a pornography habit. -- Note the word "habit". While the person has been conditioned to the point where they may think they have lost their free agency, they have not, no matter how strong the urge is. Otherwise there would be no cure, ever. And there definitely is a cure. Therefore, pornography is not an addiction per se, but a habit, a very strong one.
Resources for wives whose husbands are addicted to pornogaphy.
Treating Sexual and Pornographic Addictions -- (their word, not mine)
12 Steps to Freedom from Pornography -- this link is down, but I'm putting it here in hopes that it will go back up. a

Also, find a very good, very tough priest. Go to confession often -- once a week, if not more, depending on how many times you give in to temptation. Get on a massive prayer schedule. But do not neglect psychological help. Do not scorn going to a counselor or joining Sexaholics Anonymous, scary as that name is. And if you have a problem, it's bad. Even if you give in once every other month, don't do hard-core, it is still very bad and it will RUIN your relationships with people, especially with members of the opposite sex, especially if you love them.

If anything, do it for them. Think of that person and do it for them.

There. Well. I've written a much more lengthy post than I intended. This is actually a pet thing of mine, pornography. I'm convinced it is the source of all the world's evils. If not all of them, then a lot of them. Don't believe me? Some hard facts.

I used the word "pornography" a lot. If someone stumbles across this in a search, then ... I hope they get some help. Good luck, and God bless.
posted by Lauren, 12:31 PM


Have you read JPII's documen?

For the Church, the first responsibility is the constant, clear teaching of the faith and, therefore, of objective moral truth, including the truth about sexual morality. In an era of permissiveness and moral confusion, this requires that the Church be a prophetic voice and, often, a sign of contradiction. The so-called "ethic" of immediate personal gratification is fundamentally opposed to integral human growth and fulfillment. Education for family life and indeed for responsible life in society requires formation in chastity and self-discipline. By contrast, pornography and wanton violence can blind individuals to the divine image in the human person, can weaken marriage and family life and can do serious harm to individuals and to society itself.
commented by Anonymous Anonymous, 4:34 AM  

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