{    Cnytr   }

{Wednesday, January 26, 2005  }

.:{Beat this, Holy Whappers ... }:.

9. When therefore Saint Schothinus, by these and other severe chastisements, had purged himself from all molestations and imperfections of lustful desires, as though he followed after the purity of an agel here on earth, then began other corporeal creatures also to obey him and recognize him as an angel of God; wherefore he oftentimes walked dryshod over the sea, without the help of boat. Once, while he thus walked on the sea to pass into Britain, he met with the ship that carried St. Barry the Bishop; who, beholding and recognizing this man of God, enquired of himwherefore he thus walked on the sea. To whom Scothin answered that this was a flowery field whereon he walked; and presently, stretching his hand down to the water, he took from the midst of the ocean a handful of vermillion flowers which, in proof of his assertion, he cast into the Bishop's lap. The Bishop for his part, to maintain his own truth, drew a fish from the waters and cast it towards St. Scothin; whereupon, magnifying God in His marvellous works, they departed with blessings from the other.

10. Behold, a messenger came from the king with the news that his only daughter was even now dead: at which tidings the kking who had no son, was sore afraid. But presently, recovering, he said to his peers, "O counsellors of my bosom and faithful friends of my secret thoughts, let none of us reveal my daughter's death to these stranger saints; but let us say that mine only son is dead." And he added: "Unless they raise up to me a son instead of that daughter, I will cast them all into prison." When therefore the holy Abbot and his elder companions was brought into the royal presence, then said the king: "If ye would found in our domain an abbey rich in lands and goods, then beseech your God to raise up from the jaws of hell my son who is even now dead, the only hope of my kingdom; but if ye may not obtain this, then shall ye depart dishonored from our realm, or remain as slaves among us." The holy men, hearing this, hastened to the chamber where the royal maiden lay dead: then the Abbot St. Gerald turned to the corpse and prayed: "O Eternal God, Who art the protector of all that trust in Thee, Who takest away the anguish of Thy faithful people, Who didst dry up the Red Sea for the captuve Israelites and miraculously loose Peter from his bonds, have mercy and loose us also, who are prisoners to these barbarians, from this perilous pass into which we are come by the death of the King's daughter, insomuch as Thou mayest make of this dead maiden, by Thy marvellous power, a living youth, granting to him quick motion and sense through our ministry." After which prayer the king turned to him and said "O man of God, saving thy reverence, it is my only son who is dead, and whom I beseech thee to vouchsafe to raise up." Then said St. Gerald, "Be it son or daughter, may God Who giveth life to all, and to Whom all things are possible, vouchsafe to raise thee up a male child." Whereupon, making a sign of the cross, he poured water into the maiden's mouth from that stone which he ever carried with him from his mother's womb; and, to the amazement of all beholders, a royal youth arose forthwith from the bier; by which unwonted miracle their infidelity was scattered, and the faith of them that believed was made more strong ... Then the king and his dukes endowed this new son with thirty townships of land, together with all the appurtenances thereof."

~From Acta Sanctorum Hiberniae of John Colgan, an Ulsterman who became Professer of Theology at Louvain

My challenge: Beat That.
posted by Lauren, 10:41 PM


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